Thursday, January 18, 2007

What do You Really Want in Life ?

My good Dr friend dropped by the office just after lunch. We exchanged the very blase professional conversation until suddenly we changed topic. The reason, well sudden surge in price of the company's share lately. Kurang-lebih, the discussion is about having more money in life but I like to twist the conversation the following way...

Gondai : What do you want in this life ?
Dr Friend : I want to have a good life and not have to worry about money to enjoy it.

Gondai : Basically, you want to have a lot of money or be rich, or you are not having enough now...
Dr Friend: More or less I have enough..but still short to make me really happy like if I want to buy anything, the money is always there..

Gondai: Are you sure money is what you want or the wanting itself ?
Dr. Friend : What do you mean ?

Gondai: Take it from me, I am in the forties now and maybe a bit philosophical and I beleive that money or any worldy thing is not always the thing we want in life. For instance, I used to yearn of having nice cars, houses and many other things. But when I actually have them, I found out that I want more and more. What I am saying is that , Wanting is actually better than having and sometimes, what you want is not necessarily what you really need...and what you don't want is what actually best for you..remember Surah Al-Baqarah Ayat 216
...and it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allâh knows but you do not know..
Dr. Friend: But for now, I really believe that getting more money is what I need..and working with this company may not make me get what I want..that's why I am considering leaving the company if any good offer comes by..

Gondai: If that the case, what you really want is to find a better job..or a job that can satisfy your need spiritually and physically..a job that turns into something your really happy to do, like your used to tell me that if we love our job so much and take good care of it, the money part will take care of itself..right?
Dr Friend: Yeah..I still remember that but sometimes, part of me always saying that the grass is always greener outside there and with the kind of monotonous thing I do everyday, things do get really boring and depressing..maybe you are right, the money part is not really that important..but getting recognizition and fast tracking to the top are what I really want now...

Gondai: I used to have that kind of feeling few years back..but maybe due to my own weaknesses, I never made any serious effort to get out from this company although I am very tempted with several offers..I always beleive in this idea that if I want to get out from this company, it is because I want to be on my own and not to work with another employer or, because my service is required by the government..beleive me, despite all the setbacks, bureaucracy and sometimes our own frustration with this company, this company still among the best in this country for us to work with and also to contribute to the people..yeah sometimes we do get carried away with boredom and also jealousy when others get promoted earlier but thats' life..sometimes we have to look at ourselves and assess why we are not what we are when it comes to promotion..never blame others for our own weaknesses as it will only make us even weaker..

Dr. Friend: It easier for you to say because you already have what you for me I am still where I am right now and looking at our HR policy right now, maybe I have to wait a bit longer to be as same position as you...

Gondai: well, I am also a man of many wishes but that also really depends on how we see things. As a human being, you can never have what you really want including fast promotion..really, we have inside us 'nafsu' but inshallah, what you need will be given by Allah if you work hard for it..over the years, I have experienced many difficulties..heck, at one point in my career, I was not even promoted for almost seven years ..but I persevered and I complained and at the same time I also prayed and worked harder..maybe because of this Allah helps me along the way..and until today, actually I have what I need but still lacking in what I want..see the difference ?..what is important to me now is I will do anything as long as what I do coincides with what Allah wants..that is what really matters actually..sometimes, after you have tried your best, leave it to Allah to decide..but what is important, do make doa' to Him as mentioned in Al-Baqarah-186
...And when My slaves ask you (O Muhammad ) concerning Me, then (answer them), I am indeed near (to them by My Knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me (without any mediator or intercessor). So let them obey Me and believe in Me, so that they may be led aright...

Dr. Friend: well..not really sure what you say is good for me to apply and vice-versa...but we are all different but yet the same in many ways..nonetheless, thanks for the talk man..we should do this again sometimes..

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